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Armaros

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    Saint Mark
    Armaros got a reaction from Saint Mark in UTWP Project: Commend The Holy Principality of Saint Mark   
    Most of what I think has been said by LD already. Some minor things:
    - Influence has a capital letter, I think you might want to change that.
    - You might wish to specify what he accomplished during his time as Minister of foreign affairs and what is role as Guardian meant.
    - Like LD noted, more specified information is needed on his involvement in Albion, Osiris and TSR.
    Really good first draft, though!
  2. Like
    Teralyon
    Armaros got a reaction from Teralyon in UTWP Project: Commend The Holy Principality of Saint Mark   
    Most of what I think has been said by LD already. Some minor things:
    - Influence has a capital letter, I think you might want to change that.
    - You might wish to specify what he accomplished during his time as Minister of foreign affairs and what is role as Guardian meant.
    - Like LD noted, more specified information is needed on his involvement in Albion, Osiris and TSR.
    Really good first draft, though!
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