Joe Bobs
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Posts posted by Joe Bobs
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My thoughts too Westwind. I always find animals doing silly things funny. But then again I find fart jokes funny.
Heeheehee.
My first thought when I saw the first edit was that people thought someone had forced the orangutan into that position, which of course would be horrible. I was really surprised to find it was peeing that offended them.
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It's nice to know a photo I chose is the biggest news of the week! I had been looking for a gif of a monkey throwing poop, but in all the gifs I found it was too difficult to see that it was poop. And I stumbled across that! I recall it being very late and thinking 'that'll do'. Whoda thunkit?
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That would make an odd episode of Jerry Springer...
'Next up we have a girl who claims her father used her to gain intel on the FRA. Her father claims she was passing puppet nation names to the UIAF. And we'll meet several conspiracists who claim the daughter and father are the same person!'
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I'll make sure we have her name in the FRA intel files then!
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Mine already wants to be an Admin.
You know you've been playing NS too long when...
And congrats to you and your daughter Westwind!
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I might note that as a citizen of Osiris I do not mean any of my comments here in an endearing way. I did not appreciate your people's comments about my region-mates.
I've personally not said anything against any Osirans, and what other GRAers do and say is something I cannot control.
I personally have only made comments against Old Fed/PUT, and I stand by it. Everything I said was in reaction to his statement and was attacking what he said, I didn't make comments about him as a person. I think that's fair. I'll admit my tone was stronger than I would usually use but I was really annoyed at the tone he used.
I don't like the fact that Osiris and TEP, in their official statements, made comments on the GRA-Lazarus relationship. I don't think that's any of their business and its up to Lazarus to say whatever they like.
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From the Office of the Arch-Chancellor of the Founderless Regions Alliance
Date: May 2014
Forum: s7.zetaboards.com/FRA
Greetings;
This is the first update of the May-August term for the Founderless Regions Alliance's cabinet.
Moving Forward with a New Term
With the new term starting, my goals as Arch-Chancellor largely revolve around general modernization and streamlining the FRA's operational facilities and policies in hopes of increasing our productivity. This term only started mere days ago, so not much has been done quite yet in regards to that, but we hope to take a look at reforming our forum structure, the FRA Rangers' chain of command, our training procedures, our resources, etc. in the coming weeks, while also recruiting, defending, and doing what we usually do.
If these reforms go well, we will follow by experimenting with an interesting line-up of ideas that you'll have to wait a bit to see. Regardless, I and the Cabinet are looking quite forward to making the most of the new term.
FRA Leads Liberation of Liberal Haven
I am pleased to announce the successful liberation of Liberal Haven from the Right Wing Uprising. The mission, which was performed on 5/14's major update, was led and organized by the FRA Cabinet in cooperation with the Lazarene Liberation Army and, of course, Tim, who daringly attempted to trigger for a region that updated immediately after a feeder. Due to a sleepy delegate, the triggering ultimately wasn't necessary, but his efforts are nonetheless appreciated.
Liberal Haven was of particular concern as a mission because the RWU placed several long-term sleepers in the region and was able to put the stockpiled influence to use through banjections and passwording the region. Cercueil, who is also known as "German Dragons" of NAZI EUROPE, took the delegacy just over fifty days ago and was succeeded by Curious Gecko, another sleeper. We originally planned to submit our own liberation proposal of the region, but Cormac A Stark wrote a fine resolution, beating us to the punch. All in all, it worked out, as the passing of that liberation opened the door for removing the Fascists from Liberal Haven.
The coalition of forces that liberated the region include the FRA and the Lazarene Liberation Army, whom were responsible for coordinating the operation, the East Pacific Sovereign Army, the RRA, Spiritus, the New Southern Army, the New Pacific Order, and the UDL. We also found ourselves in a rare instance where we were pursuing the same objective militarily as the UIAF; though they originally intended to work separately with TSP to liberate the region, our operation was underway prior to their set-up and thus TSP joined us, and the UIAF, ISRA, and the UK ended up endorsing our lead and Geomania of TSP. The logistics of this arrangement were certainly uneasy at first, but fortunately the liberation was not derailed.
A good laugh was had after the mission as well...4 hours ago: The People's Liberation Army Xiao-Yang was banned from Union of Nationalists by The Middle Republic of The Kuomintang.
Rangers Withdraw as Natives Successfully Refound Slavia
The Rangers withdrew from Slavia this Tuesday after receiving North Polish Union's request to do so in preparation for a refound. Slavia, which was raided because the UIAF saw an opportunity to target it after the founder of the large region suddenly ceased to exist, was held by the occupying imperialist piling force until Dyr Nasad thwarted their refound attempt at the end of the winter.
The effort was a long haul, both for us and, more dramatically, the residents of Slavia. The initial confusion caused by raiders insisting that their attack was an attack on Slavia because of its role in the FRA, even though Slavia was in the process of withdrawing from the Alliance, was as baffling as it sounds. The massive piling force that was deployed to Slavia was an obstacle that made a standard liberation impossible, so NPU and myself had no choice but to request help from the Security Council in ensuring that the UIAF didn't turn Slavia into a trophy.
When we managed to take back the region, we had to spend almost a month securing Slavia before we were able to safely transfer the delegacy to NPU, and this week Slavia's community finally pulled off a professional-grade refound of their own, thus ending the ordeal. It is obvious that this has been a trying experience for Slavia, and it was tough not being able to help sooner, but I'm truly glad that the community was able to brave through it all and work with us to re-secure their region.
I wish them the best of luck on their future endeavors and the protection of their region's sovereignty. Regardless of whether or not they are members of the FRA, we will continue to offer our support of their right to sovereignty in the face of imperialism.
New Cabinet Elected, Term Length Amendment Passes the RA
The FRA Regional Assembly recently wrapped up cabinet elections. You may notice that we usually don't have elections in May: this is correct. As Joneswest alluded to in the previous update, we recently implemented election reforms that effected a constitutional amendment mandating terms that are longer than past terms by one additional month. Our short terms have often been a subject of slight irritation, so the amendment was able to pass with ease. The change required that our usual election schedule be altered to suit longer terms. Elections will now occur in February, May, August, and November.
The new cabinet is as follows:Cabinet of the Founderless Regions Alliance
Arch-Chancellor: Milograd
Vice-Chancellor: Jonewest
Regional Liaison Officer: Joe Bobs
Chief of Defense: Dyr Nasad
Minister of Intelligence: Guy
Speaker of the Regional Assembly: Wibblefeet
Just Around the Corner: FRAVision
FRAVision, our annual song contest between NS players on their region's behalfs, is also just around the corner. While the details and scheduling are still being worked out presently, those interested in participating as contestants are encouraged to begin thinking about what they'd like to submit. I and Wopruthien will be serving as the event's organizers this year and I fully intend to take bribes from any person who can convince Blue Wolf to actually record a cover of "Tradition" from Fiddler on the Roof.
Fun (Or Maybe Not?) Discussion of the Week: F.R.A. vs. FRAH, With Linguistics Lessons from Joe Bobs
To the surprise of some of us in the FRA, there are actually people who pronounce FRA as "FRAH" instead of reading aloud the initialism. We made a topic about it and people were simply horrified that people actually do that.
That's not terribly interesting, but what is interesting is that Joe Bobs, our RLO, was actually able to explain why most people use "F.R.A." but some use "FRAH". His linguistics degree was the source of both knowledge and sympathy for his financial well-being -- he took the time to explain the initialism's popularity below. It's actually pretty interesting.However, 'f' is a fricative (a sound where friction is used, e.g. s, f, th, z), and a fricative into an approximant, ending on a vowel, is less natural to say. I'm trying to think of other examples... 'schwa', 'three', 'free'. But notice that the two of those which are easier to say 'three' and 'free' end on high vowels towards the front of the mouth. For 'frah', your tongue has to move backwards in the mouth, and the 'r' almost becomes a 'w', or it does to me anyway. I think the phonemic pattern may be more common in German, so maybe Germans could say it easier.
I took up asking him why "ointment" is such an unappealing word after the fact, and he happily explained that too. He may analyze a word of your choice upon request if you're lucky.
Comic of the Update
Finally, enjoy this comic.
*Sorry TWP, IMG not working
The lesson? Lima beans are a tool of the opposition. Lazarene rice is inalieable freedom.
Thank you for reading, and you'll be hearing from us again later this month.
Milograd
Arch-Chancellor of the Founderless Regions Alliance -
Hahaha! I can't remember a time the GRA wasn't bouncing from one controversy from the next. I think we've all gone grey from the stress!
We'll be releasing a statement in the next few days.
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Thankyou both!
TWP is cool.
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Rude, crude and a lot of fun to read. Nice work.
At least there's some sense left in NS.
Westwind, BBD - Would you be happy for me to quote you with the above? Westwind, I'd include what your quote was in response to as well.
This is for a piece I'm doing on responses to our FA updates.
Cheers!
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At least there's some sense left in NS.
Westwind, I think I can speak for the GRA in saying you are hereby an honourary GRAer.
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That's what we aim for!
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No problem!
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Global Right Alliance News
Second April Update
Hello from the GRA!
The GRA was founded in 2005 and refounded in 2007, with our population peak in 2010 at over 500 nations. We are a founding member of the FRA. We are known for our political innovation, including the infamous 'rotatorship' (rotating dictatorship), and also for our "unique" character. We're so badass, sometimes we don't pierce the lid when we microwave stuff. That's right.
In the immortal words of Jonewest, 'f*ck common courtesy, this is the GRA.'
Lazarus GRAvaded!
No, the GRA hasn't gone invader, this is a GRAvasion. Regular readers will recall the promotion of GRA junkets recently, and the first took place last week in Lazarus, with many GRAers in attendance. Of particular note was Sovereign Liberties ability to be banned within a few hours of joining, and Old Zertaxia's rapid manipulation of the fledgling socialist economy to become the wealthiest person in the region.
Future junkets are planned in Texas, 10,000 Islands and United Kingdom. If any other region is crazy enough to host us, then please contact Foreign Affairs Minister Joe Bobs.
Political Parties Storm the Region
In recent weeks, the GRA has seen the relaunch of the political party system. The GRA has seen many different types of parties over the years, some focusing on real world issues, some on in-game issues. So far two parties (was three, we'll come to that later) have been launched, Joe Bobs and Sovereign Liberties have formed the Cosmopolitan People's Party, which believes in establishing legislation and an extensive foreign policy, whilst Old Zertaxia and Uropa have formed the GRA Centrist and Traditionalist Party, which believes laws should be created as edicts of the Speaker, and a more restricted foreign policy. All citizens can sign up to a party or create their own!
Aura Hyperia told where they can stick it
Aura Hyperia, renowned douches of the NationStates world, have this month had relations with the GRA severed. The GRA had initially been interested in pursuing a war on The Black Riders with Aura Hyperia, however, this was before certain facts came to light. Namely, that this is the Emperor of Aura Hyperia, Mara Sargon:
Mara posted Aura Hyperia's manifesto in their GRA embassy, several pages of poorly written social Darwinist claptrap, that in parts was far worse than some sentiments expressed by invaders such as TBR. The GRA quickly responded, Uropa brought down the banhammer with a mighty swing, and now the former Aura Hyperia embassy has become a meme spam thread. We don't archive our enemies' embassies, we turn them into public urinals.
People's Assembly Cracks Down on Spies
Remember, keep mum, she's not so dumb! Careless talk costs lives!
The People's Assembly is currently examining legislation to prosecute those accused of spying or treason, a delicate balance of protecting the region and restraining authority. Alongside this, the People's Assembly is drafting a Judicial Law, which will allow the Assembly to act as a court, all citizens to act as the jury, and an elected Foreperson for each trial.
Joe Bobs Promoted
Joe Bobs addresses the Cabinet.
Joe Bobs has been appointed to First Minister by Speaker Old Zertaxia. Joe Bobs' will continue to serve as Foreign Affairs Minister, but will also aid the Speaker with other executive duties, allowing the Speaker to focus on the legislative and judicial offices. He will be working closely with Internal Affairs Minister Sovereign Liberties.
Zarnack on Trial
Last week, a newbie by the name of Zarnack found his way to the GRA, and quickly irritated the old guard by not listening to anyone's advice, making hyperbolic political generalisations, and being super serious - these are no-nos in the GRA. He then posted a load of crap on the RMB (later claiming this was the action of his "brother") and then founded his own region with a lot of puppets he claims are real people. He founded a political party which has now been closed. He particularly enraged GRAers by stating on the IRC: 'guys, don't treat me like a noob, treat me like I'm one of you, just don't be mean.' This left GRAers confused and unable to respond to the contradictory statement. He now stands trial for attempting to recruit from the region.
GRADF Kick Invaders from Warzone Africa
The GRADF have successfully detagged Warzone Africa, removing the TBR flag, closing their embassy, and getting rid of their general lameness. When asked to comment, First Lieutenant Joe Bobs simply lifted his kilt and bared his buttocks to the invaders.
OMAHD Bar a Hotbed of Debate
How political debate works in the GRA...
The OMAHD Bar has been a hotbed of political debate this week, with subjects such as colonialism, Catholicism, Egypt, science, film and the Confederate flag. Views have ranged from sissy liberal hippie (Joe Bobs) to Rhodesian native crushing (Northern Chittowa) to gun-toting Southern hick (Sovereign Liberties) to freedom squashing political correctness (Jonewest). Everyone is welcome to have their say in the OMAHD bar, just don't expect anyone to go easy on you...
Joe Bobs: GRA History Nerd
Joe Bobs has continued to publish (in serial form) the History of the GRA. Currently the Foreword and Parts I and II of Chapter 1 are available for your enjoyment, Part III to follow in the nest week or two.
Spam Fight!
Internal Affairs Minister Sovereign Liberties has launched Spam Game Teams, which sees the region divided into two spam-happy teams, the Dancing Ice Hawks and Whipped Servant Boys, and a point scoring system introduced to all spam games. All are welcome to join!
GRA Theme Tune
To the tune of the theme music from Cheers:
Making your way in the GRA takes everything you got.Getting away from Uropa, sure would help a lot.
Maybe Jonewest called you lame...
By now you oughta know,
Welcome to the GRA!
Where everyone's a fucking pain!
You wanna be in the land of Old Z,
who thinks they're all cray-cray.
You wanna be where there's never a word for 'flame'.
You wanna be with a bunch of APDs,
Where noobs end up the same.
You want to be where they'll pretend to forgeeeet... your name
du du du du duuuuh
Finally, the GRA maintains its eternal war against Falconias.
In the words of Old Zertaxia, you all cray-cray.
Written by Joe Bobs. With thanks for contributions from Sovereign Liberties, fighter4u, Jonewest and Old Zertaxia.
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Congrats to you both!
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I would note that the voting system mentioned in TNP did not work for me. I received the link, and it refused to accept my votes. So once again...yet another problem with supposed 'democracy' in NS.
Sounds like 'hanging chads' all over again!
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At least you aren't trying to overtake the GCRs
Baby steps!
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Global Right Alliance News
First April Update[/align]
Hello from the GRA!
The GRA was founded in 2005 and refounded in 2007, with our population peak in 2010 at over 500 nations. We are a founding member of the FRA. We are known for our political innovation, including the infamous 'rotatorship' (rotating dictatorship), and also for our "unique" character. We're so badass, sometimes we go to bed without taking out our contact lenses.
In the immortal words of Jonewest, 'f*ck common courtesy, this is the GRA.'
GRA History Project
The Great Consolidated Library of the GRA - if you find Joe Bobs in here, do not approach him, we believe he has gone feral.
This month, Joe Bobs was appointed 'The Architect' of the GRA's Archives, as he foolishly volunteered to sort through the dumping ground of threads that previously had forum titles like 'General Discussion' and 'Government'. After reading through a decade of 'Happy Birthdays!', 'Pidgeon Island's Hate Lists' and Uropa asking newbies who the f*ck they are, Joe Bobs emerged from the Archives, having finally given order to the chaos. Having now read everything GRAers have said in a decade, Joe Bobs is seriously mentally ill and considered psychotic, do not approach him.
However, it did enable the creation of a timeline of GRA leaders and the following historiography of the region:*Foundation Era (April 2005 - October 2006)
- Dawn Age (April 2005 - August 2005)
- Dipes Presidency (August 2005 - February 2006)
- Later Foundation Era (February 2006 - October 2006)
*Zertaxian Revolution (October 2006 - March 2007)
*Council Era (March 2007 - April 2008)
- Early Council Era (March 2007 - September 2007)
- Later Council Era (September 2007 - April 2008)
*The Chaos (April 2008 - February 2010)
- First Rotatorship & People's Republic (April 2008 - September 2008)
- Warring States Period (September 2008 - March 2009)
- The Great Rotatorship (March 2009 - February 2010)
*Gilded Age (February 2010 - December 2010)
- The Rise (February 2010 - August 2010)
- The Fall (August 2010 - December 2010)
*Uropan Revolution (December 2010 - March 2011)
*The Restoration (March 2011 - May 2012)
*Soverties' Struggle (May 2012 - February 2014)
- First Try and eRepublik (May 2012 - February 2013)
- Second Try (February 2013 - February 2014)
And this funky little graph of activity over the years:
Joe Bobs would also like to thank Old Zertaxia and Jonewest for doing some minor admin things in relation to this. Nah, they were super-admins and we wub them.
Population Rise
We are pleased to announce the continuation of the GRA's rise in population. At the time of going to press, the region is home to 102 nations, up from 81 in the last update. Sadly, we have not yet overtaken 10,000 Islands, but we remain confident it will happen in the next two weeks (if we keep saying that, one day it has to be true, right?).
We are also pleased to be able to welcome back G-tech and Chin Chillas to the GRA this month. We also welcome new citizens Dyr Nasad, Horse, Takanashi and Libetarian Republics.
Govindia Strikes Again!
Govindia and the GRA have a long and ugly history, going back to the time he began Facebook stalking Old Zertaxia. This month, he bashed the GRA in his election campaign in Wintreath, calling GRAers 'trolls', 'argumentative', 'hostile', 'abrasive' and stating that we 'thrive off internet drama'. However, despite these compliments, he also said we have only been 'helpful to an extent as defenders'. The People's Assembly of the GRA lodged a formal protest against Govindia's statement, which has been hotly debated in the Wintreath GRA embassy. The GRA thanks all those Wintreathians who responded, and helped smooth past the matter to ensure relations between Wintreath and the GRA remained friendly and cooperative. Govindia did not respond.
Diplomatic Crisis with Captialist Paradise
A minor diplomatic crisis also occurred when Sovereign Liberties' stated his opposition to the opening of an embassy with Capitalist Paradise, when he revealed that last year, CP had attempted to recruit from the GRA. Sucrati, representing CP, has stated that this was a one-off action and it is the policy of CP not to recruit from regions with which they share ties. After some discussion, it was decided that as the matter did appear to have been a singular occurrence, it would be forgotten in the interest of building diplomatic relations between the two regions.
People's Assembly
The last few weeks have seen a number of topics discussed in the People's Assembly, the direct-democracy governing body of the GRA. Joe Bobs proposed the 'In-Game Embassies Act', to set punishments for members of the Founder Nation Control Board who took actions on approving or disapproving embassies. However, the act was not passed into law, due to lack of support.
The formation of the GRA Invader Nut Smashers (GRAINS) army continues, with opposition mostly coming from Sovereign Liberties and active FRA Rangers in the GRA, and support from Joe Bobs and Old Zertaxia, with Jonewest flip-flopping like a dying fish and Uropa taking the opportunity to vocalise his dislike for the FRA.
The main debate in the PA has taken place over the rights of citizenship in the region. Almost all workings of the GRA Government (excluding the GRADF) take place in public, and have done so almost since the region's founding in 2005. However, the rights to post in the People's Assembly came to question, as members of the Aura Hyperia delegation posted their opinions on the possible AH-GRA in the PA. Many said only citizens should have this right, whilst others wanted the right available to all, with only voting held for citizens only. However, the law became further complicated as two proposals came to the floor: Old Zertaxia's Citizenship Act, and Sovereign Liberties' redrafting of the People's Declaration of Assembling (the constitution of the GRA). These are currently being taken to vote.
Protestors demand rights for citizens.
Finally, one law has seen almost universal agreement (excluding Jonewest who is a party-pooper), the Anniversary Act, which would see the creation of six public holidays in the region. Whilst the dates and exact nature of the holidays are yet to be confirmed, the suggested line-up is:
GRA Founding Day
Old Zertaxia Day - to celebrate the GRA's longest-serving citizen, Speaker and former President, and in particular for his actions to save the region in its early days, when many natives abandoned the region following deletion of its founder.
Uropa Day - to celebrate the region's most vocal member and former Chancellor, and specifically to mark Uropa's actions in forcing the opening of Parliament to the public in its earliest days.
Dipes Day - to celebrate one of the longest serving Presidents and greatest Defenders, and to mark the creation of the first left-wing party in June '05, ending the region's right wing slant.
Northern Chittowa Day - to celebrate the FRA co-founder, former President, Foreign Affairs guru and Defender extraordinaire, and to mark the creation of the forums by NC.
South Land Day - to celebrate one of the founding fathers of the GRA and first President, specifically to mark the day South Land announced an end to the tyranny of New Emerica, the first democratic government, and the launch of the 'Defender only' policy.
Rotatorship Week - to celebrate the most infamous of the GRA's political system, a week of a mini-rotatorship will take place.
New Embassies
We are happy to announce the opening of the Kantrias embassy! Only one new embassy this month, following the thirty-two opened in March.
The GRA in the FRA
We are also pleased to announce that Jonewest, GRADF General, has been fulfilling his duties as Acting Arch Chancellor of the FRA during Karputsk's absence. This week, Foreign Affairs Minister Joe Bobs has also been elected Regional Liaison Officer in the FRA.
Finally, the GRA maintains its eternal war against Falconias.
In the words of Jonewest, NO.
Written by Joe Bobs. With thanks for contributions from Jonewest and Old Zertaxia. -
No problem, whenever you're ready, the embassy is set up.
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I've managed databases, and I don't think I could ever be a Database Manager.
Meh, it's not that bad. Fiddling around in SQL mostly. I use Cognos a lot too. I like SQL, it makes sense. But it scares the crap out of me too, if I'm making big changes I re-read my script about 10 times to make sure all my 'where' clauses are in!
There are people reading this thinking this is the nerdiest discussion ever.
ed: Forgot to ask, will TWP be sending a representative over to the GRA too?
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It's easier to do than some think.
Time was, you only needed to know DOS. The DOS and Windows. (And Mac.....and Unix) Then Windows 3.0, 3.1, 3.11, NT, 95, 98, 2000, ME, XP.......Sun Unix, ATT Unix, Linux, etc etc........and on it goes. Software diversifies like life does, evolving to fit into a niche of need, while survival of the fittests leaves things like WebOS as dead ends in software evolution. Some for forum software.
Yes, as I've said elsewhere, it's a shame there isn't more communication across the divides in NS. Interaction is the basis of the game in many ways. I hope we see more inter-regional activities, conventions, etc.
And tell me about it! I'm a Database Manager, drives me mad!
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Well it does mean if one provider goes out of business, we know there are others to jump ship to!
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There are so many forum formats now though, NS has diversified!
I can't get this aligning right.
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Global Rights Alliance News
Second March Update[/align]
Hello from the GRA!
The GRA was founded in 2005 and refounded in 2007, with our population peak in 2010 at over 500 nations. We are a founding member of the FRA. We are known for our political innovation, including the infamous 'rotatorship' (rotating dictatorship), and also for our "unique" character. In the GRA dictionary entry for 'politeness', it simply says 'who the f*ck are you, signed, Uropa'. We're so badass, we don't even click 'safely eject hardware', we tear that bad boy right out.
In the immortal words of Jonewest, 'f*ck common courtesy, this is the GRA.'
GRAvasion: GRA Overseas Junkets
Hoping I've grabbed your attention by swearing twice in the header, but knowing attention on the internet is a precious commodity I will likely lose in a few short paragraphs, I thought best to put this at the top!
The GRA would like to propose what we are calling 'GRA junkets' to our friends' regions. This would involve what the FRA are unkindly calling a 'GRAvasion', or what may be more favourably called a 'visit' to your region, during which as many members of the GRA as I can round up would pop over, get involved in whatever chats are open to foreign visitors, helping with activity and perhaps providing a helpful outsider's view on issues of the day. Equally, we would appreciate a return of the favour. We think it's a nice way to spread activity and meet new people.
The kind of rocking parties you can expect when the GRA come to visit.
If you're interested, please let me know. I warn you, I will not be held responsible for Uropa's actions!
GRA and Aura Hyperia lead the way in crossing the divide
This month, the GRA and Aura Hyperia began diplomatic relations with the exchange of embassies, crossing the invader/defender barrier. Aura Hyperia would be described as imperialist, but hold themselves to a moral code of no griefing, and no permanent banjecting. Both agreed that it was a shame that elsewhere in the NS world, the invader/defender barrier has become so large that we cannot talk across the gap, as evidenced by the embassy refusals and restrictive maskings that have become increasingly common around our game. Joe Bobs commented, 'Some of the most fun embassies I've taken part in have been defender embassies in raider regions, and vice versa. Several years ago, the GRA had an embassy with LWU, and the baiting that took place made it one of our most active embassies.'
This story has taken on an unexpected development however, as Aura Hyperia have proposed joint activities between the two region's militaries in a war focused against The Black Riders. High General Jonewest and Foreign Affairs Minister Joe Bobs have taken this proposal to the People's Assembly for debate. If this action is taken, it would, to this reporter's knowledge, be the first time a joint Defender-Imperialist Army had launched war against a Raider, with exercises likely to involve all aspects of warfare, including detagging, defending and liberation.
The issue has become the subject of a fierce debate in the GRA, with Jonewest and Joe Bobs leading the Pro argument, alongside Mara Sargon and Frostmark from Aura Hyperia, and Sovereign Liberties with some support from FRA members leading the Con argument. Old Zertaxia was eventually persuaded by the Pro-side.
At the time of going to press, the latest development is the proposal of creating a new wing of the GRA military, the GRA Invader Nut Smashers (GRAINS). This allows the GRADF to retain it's purist defender ideology, whilst the GRAINS try other tactics.
Population Explosion
In under 6 weeks, the GRA's population has exploded from a measly 35 to a whopping 81 nations! Joe Bobs has pledged that the GRA will overtake 10,000 Islands as the largest UCR within the next two weeks.
(Ed note: It is not clear if penguins understand numbers. It is even more unlikely that drunk penguins understand numbers.)
Sadly, this month saw Love and Honour, Jivdom and Lower Bowmania's nations CTE, three of the greats of the GRA. We hope they come back to the GRA some day.
New Constitution
The People's Assembly have agreed on a new constitution, authored by Sovereign Liberties. Full text as follows:The People's Declaration of Assembling
Article One
People's Assembly
1.1 The People's Assembly is the supreme governing body of the region, the Global Right Alliance. The People's Assembly is composed of the enfranchised residents of the region, the citizenry. Residents gain enfranchisement with the approval of the Government.
1.2 The enactment of legislation requires proposal in the People's Assembly, deliberation for a minimum of forty-eight hours, and in an open vote lasting forty-eight hours, a simple majority for statutes and a three-fourths majority for amendments to this declaration.
1.3 The People's Assembly may dismiss the Government with a motion of no confidence, which is an open vote lasting forty-eight hours. Only one motion of no confidence may be proposed every seven days. The motion passes with a simple majority.
1.4 Whereupon a motion of no confidence is passed by the People's Assembly, the Speaker and the Government is dismissed and a new election for Speaker is held. Nominations begin immediately and end in forty-eight hours. Elections begin after nominations end and last for forty-eight hours. The candidate who commands a majority is elected Speaker. Elections repeat until a Speaker is elected.
1.5 Positive abstentions do not factor into the calculation of any required majorities.
Article Two
Government
2.1 The Speaker is the President of the People's Assembly and first among equals of the citizenry. The Speaker is responsible for the passage of laws and for the governance of the region.
2.2 The Speaker may appoint and dismiss offices and officers to the Government of the region. The governance of the region includes the following:
2.2.1 the administration of foreign affairs, including the composition and distribution of foreign updates of the Government, and the representation of the region abroad;
2.2.2 the protection of the region in cooperation with the founder nation and the forum of the region in cooperation with the forum administration;
2.2.3 the administration of military affairs and intelligence;
2.2.4 the recruitment of nations to the region;
2.2.5 the integration of nations into the region and citizens into the Government;
2.2.6 the approval of citizenship;
2.2.7 the recording of the affairs of the region, including the maintenance of a record of the citizenry;
2.2.8 and the moderation and facilitation of nongovernmental activity and the promotion, management, and supervision of nongovernmental regional events.
2.3 In the event of the resignation of the Speaker, the aforementioned election procedure begins immediately.[/align]
Other laws being discussed at the time of going to press are a Bill of Rights, the Separation of Militaries Act, the In-Game Embassies Act, and a selection of so called 'Practical Laws'.
Expansion of Embassies
Joe Bobs has been mercilessly spamming the NS world in a ruthless bid of regional self-promotion, as you are no doubt aware, or else you wouldn't be reading this! He has released the following statement:Whilst I know some may see my Foreign Affairs program as excessive, it is based on solid principles. Firstly, I enjoy it. I have always enjoyed spreading across the NS world, engaging with new communities and meeting new people. I wish to share this with my fellow GRAers, and I also wish to share the GRA with others. Secondly, I believe the GRA has always seen some of its best activity through foreign visitors, so I see this, along with recruitment, as one of the essential ways to build forum activity. I also hope that our embassies bring activity to our friends. Thirdly, I'm a strong believer in NS internationalism, I think the game is at its best when we have multi-regional engagement, across the divides of feederite and userite, defender and raider, independent and imperialist, role-play and game-play. I want the GRA to be a nexus whereby all these different groups can meet, and I hope our overseas readers will come and visit to share in this.
To this end, we are proud to announce new embassies with the following: Aura Hyperia, British Isles, Capitalist Paradise, Gatesville Inc, Independent Order, Mordor, NeoConfederate States of America, The New Galactic Empire, New Warsaw Pact, Osiris, Renegade Islands Alliance and Wintreath.
And we are pleased to announce the reopening of embassies with: Belgium-Netherlands, Canada, Caprecia & Nysa, Equilism, Gay, Region Inc and The West Pacific.
Jonewest commented: 'Joe Bobs has been overworking the hardly working administration staff to setup a huge array of embassies on the GRA Forums. While they may be held together by glue and bondage, for the most part the embassies look good!'
(Ed note: Image removed after Google search of 'glue and bondage' was found to violate most forums' Terms of Service...)
Jonewest Vs. Sovereign Liberties
This month saw a return to the classical language of the GRA: flame wars lasting multiple days over an arbitrary point no one can remember. Our best investigative journalists have found that the war may have begun with Sovereign Liberties' criticism of Jonewest's dismissive tone when asked to perform his Admin duties, but no one is quite certain. Both accused the other of being 'non-contributors', which has now, like so many slurs before, become a term of affection and fraternity in the GRA.
Jonewest commented as follows: 'Tensions rose, fell, and sandwiches were made for me afterwards. All has been reasoned and resolved, with a new word being added to the GRA Official Dictionary!' (Ed note: The word was 'no', which Jonewest has redefined not as a refusal, but a tool of Admins to put people in their place.) Jonewest has been a vocal opponent of the 'say no to drugs' campaign in the past, but is now launching his own 'say no to admin requests'.
Uropa held a poll into who was likely to win, in which, surprisingly, the winner was 'I'm a fwuffy penguin and want everyone to be friends Joe Bobs', 3 votes to 2 to 2.
Sovereign Liberties could not be reached for a comment, because he has chickenpox. We hope he gets well soon and has a bath in calamine.
Old Zertaxia is particularly frightened, as he can remember smallpox.
(Ed note: Sovereign Liberties is now well, but I enjoy the above picture too much to take it out. )
GRADF
The GRADF continues to operate as part of the FRA Rangers, whilst Jonewest modernises the institution. He has stated 'We are currently moving the GRADF into the modern age of strategy and tactics. With this lengthy procedure of moving data and resources from Windows 95 to Windows Millennium Edition computers it has been decided that the following honorary titles be bestowed on the following: Old Zertaxia - GRADF Whore, Northern Chittowa - GRA Watchdog, Uropa - Chief of the Military Police.
Old Zertaxia has responded: 'Even though the word "High" in High General Jonewest's title is clearly not in reference to an extremely elevated place, and rather a reference to his intoxicated state (for all you dumdums out there, Jonewest is f*cking high as balls whenever he attempt to do things, especially Admin things, especially create forums and not f*ck them up), I graciously and grandly accept the honor of GRABR Whore. Thank you.' He also added that he hates everyone.
New Formal Address for Admin Requests
After multiple attempts to make admins do things by throwing rocks at them, Joe Bobs has tried a different tactic, making the following plea in the Admin Request Thread:Oh mighty admins, oh ye powerful gods of Olympus, won't thy spare me a moment of thine great and powerful minds that unravel the mists of time, of thine mighty and strong arms that crack apart the world and the sky, of thine watchful and all-seeing eyes that look beyond the reaches of the universe! I bid thee here my plea, I pray thee grant my wish, and thou will have an obedient and loyal servant who will bring more followers to they cause, and together all the world shall tremble and quake, and fear thee and they shall know, thine names are Old Zertaxia and Jonewest!
Finally, the GRA maintains its eternal war against Falconias.
In the words of Uropa, beace.
Written by Joe Bobs. With thanks for contributions from Jonewest and Old Zertaxia.
Proud Dad
in The Lounge
Posted
I remember those days. I've recently been writing up the history of the GRA (I'm literally going through thread by thread, it's taken me two months to write the first 8000 words, which has covered the first year (2005-06)) and I came across all scandals from that time, RLA forum deletion, etc.