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Issue 353: Broadband Going To The Birds?


Kingstononia

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Broadband Going To The Birds?

 

The Issue

 

An IT firm organized an unusual race between a carrier pigeon toting a flash drive and Kingstononia's fastest internet provider. The bird easily beat the internet, prompting a debate about internet speeds.

The Debate
  1. "This is horribly embarrassing!" cries the pixelated image of popular online vlogger Sashona Zhu. Two and a half minutes of buffering later she continues, "Our internet is the slowest in the West Pacific. Our system needs a massive overhaul. We need to crank it up! Fiber optic connections all across Kingstononia! Imagine the increase in productivity. Imagine how much more connected we'll all be. It'll be well worth the cost, Leader."

     

  2. "You've got to be joking!" scoffs your Minister of Finance, Mark Patel. "The government has far more important problems at hand than dealing with trivial matters such as the internet speed. The people of Kingstononia have access to the internet. That's far better than most of the world. Leave the internet providers to run themselves and get back to the business of running the country."

     

  3. "Well, this certainly is eye-opening," exclaims amateur birdwatcher, Daniel Thiesen, with a pair of binoculars dangling from his neck. "Here we are mucking about with our inefficient technology and the birds have us beat! Clearly we need to convert all our inefficient internet into bird-based-broadband! We'll need flocks upon flocks of pigeons and a tight training schedule, but we can do it."

     

 

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