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  • 1 month later...

CNNN- Bandar. After a long, drawn-out hearing, the Craiolian Parliament voted 214-36 to impose a preliminary fine of C4.75 billion on the Craiolian Goods company for avoiding an estimated C755 million of taxes since its inception. The investigation into the alleged tax evasion is still ongoing, and Parliamentary Majority Representative Harbin Beck stated that “yet more fines may be imposed”.

 

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CRN Transcript Excerpt- “Saturday Afternoon with Tom Burkley”- May 18th, 2019

Tim: So something really strange that’s been noticed is that food hasn’t been arriving at supermarket warehouses, and we think it has something to do with Craiolian Goods and its legal situation. With me on the phone here I have a trucker who works for Craiolian Goods. He’s requested that his name remain anonymous because CG probably won’t be happy about this information being revealed. So, Mr. Anonymous, what can you tell us?

Trucker: It’s really weird, actually. Almost immediately after Parliament ruled to impose that fine on CG, my route was changed. Now instead of taking food to supermarket warehouses, we’re taking it to these nondescript warehouses on the Northern Shore. I’ve also noticed that no more food is coming in from the farms, which means my new assignment will not last very long.

Tim: So is there anything else you can tell us?

Trucker: Actually, yes. I overheard my boss saying something shady. Like, really shady.

Tim: Go on...

Trucker: Who the h—l are you?

Tim: Mr. Anonymous?

Trucker: Oh s—t. Oh s—t! They’re here!

Tim: Who exactly are they?

Trucker: AAAAAGGHHHHHH*dial tone*

Tim: Oh my. *Dialing of a phone can be heard* Hello? Police? Yes, I’d like to report a possible murder. 

—PROGRAM ENDS—

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CRAIOLIAN DAILY NEWS ROUNDUP

 

CNNN, Bandar. Tens of thousands of warehouse workers for several grocery store chains have been fired as mass layoffs continue to engulf the retail industry. Approximately 98,000 employees have been caught up in the unfolding crisis so far, and layoffs continue to be announced.

 

Excerpt from “KnowledgeConflicts”, May 19th 2019.

Adin Barnes: You know what I think is going on? The Boor Administration is starving us! That’s right, all the food is going to Bigtopia! It’s some sick Violetist scheme, and the Boors are cooperating! So pretty soon we’re going to be starving, and they’re going to be getting fat! They’re going to form some new nation with all this food! VioletBoortopia! And I’m not even going to get started with the death of that trucker on the northern shore! I’m telling you, something corrupt and illegal is happening!

—EXCERPT ENDS—

 

Excerpt from “Sunday Morning” on CRN, May 19th 2019.

Host: We’ve requested a comment from GreenGrocer and Pride Supermarkets, but so far neither of them have responded. I’ll pass this over to our breaking news specialist Tim Burkley for an update on the Craiolian Pride investigation.

*theme music plays with voiceover*- Tim Burkley’s Breaking News, on CRN.

Tim: Thanks, Jeff. Something really groundbreaking has happened with the investigation. Supposedly the CBI and the CHIA have unearthed something big, but not many details have been released. As far as we know, it must have really startled the Boor Administration because President Boor has announced a veto on the C4.5 billion fine for Craiolian Goods. Conspiracy Theorists have been going wild with this, especially with the news of that poor trucker’s death being released to the public and the circumstances that he was in. Our condolences go out to his family.

—EXCERPT ENDS—

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CNNN, Bandar. Just one week after CG was exposed, grocery chains across the nation have cancelled renting contracts on over 250 warehouses because, to quote the GreenGrocer CEO, “they have no use for them anymore.” Unrest has grown throughout the nation as there is still no response from the Boor Administration on the possible future famine.

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CRN Transcript Excerpt From “Saturday Afternoon with Tim Burkley”, 5/25/19.

 

Tim: So the whole situation relating to Craiolian Goods and even the future of the nation has just degraded. S—t really hit the fan this week, especially in Bandar. With me this week I have our current events reporter, Adam Sandhausen. I’ll hand the mic to him for the next few minutes.

 

Adam: Thanks, Tim. What you said is completely accurate. The situation has escalated rapidly. People are incredibly agitated about a possible famine, especially with no comment from the Boor Administration so far. And WikiSpills has recently released a few lines of code that they claim is from a CBI listening device discovered inside of the Craiolian Pride Central Offices. The Administration has no comment on that either thus far. We’re not going to release the code for legal purposes, but this is a massive security breach on the part of the CBI, especially with the decrypt key having been discovered.

—EXCERPT END—

 

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LocationKey: 30˚ W, 45˚ N.

TimeKeySTART:5764.6

DecryptKey: 562.4

TimeKeyEND: 3833.325

DecryptKey: 189.3

TimeKeyDecryptedSTART: 10:25

TimeKeyDecryptedEND: 20:25

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“Riots Erupt Across the Nation”

CNNN, Bandar, Bandar Province. Days of unrest across the nation, especially in the capital, erupted into open riots earlier today as the first items started disappearing from store shelves. The FCGPA (Federal Craiolian Government Protection Agency) struggled to contain the estimated 13,000 people that marched on the Capital Building, with several minor skirmishes erupting between FCGPA officers and armed protesters as the officers erected barricades around the building. As of now, 4 protesters have been injured and one killed, while there were no FCGPA casualties. President Moor Boor has announced that he will release a statement on the situation on Monday.

 

 

“Craiolian Pride CEO Missing”

CNNN, Landfall, Costal Province. The CEO of Craiolian Pride, Slee Z. Taitor, has fled mainland Craiolia, according to the Navy. In a statement released Saturday evening, the Navy announced that a small boat was spotted leaving the port of Coastal City and heading south. Taitor is suspected to be on one of the many small islands in the north of the Mile-Mer, and the Navy has announced that they will “Search every island within the waters of Craiolia”.

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“President Boor Releases Statement”

CNNN, Bandar, Bandar Province. President Mor Boor released an official statement over all radio and television stations in Craiolia early this afternoon, a transcript of which is attached:

“There comes a time in the life of every nation when order is threatened by an extreme force or forces. The apparent future famine and associated unrest is that time for this great Republic of Craiolia. To survive, we must not be divided. We must stand together against the icy hand of famine and death, as that is the only way to make it through this time of tribulation. The recent protests in major cities illustrate the fact that not everyone shares the vision of my administration for this situation. To you, I say, we must unite or die! Lay down your weapons and work with government forces to set up ration stations, commandeer food, do something other than riot in the streets! We need your help to help you. Will you step up to the call?”

So far, reactions appear to be mixed, with about half of the protesters across the nation agreeing to help the government. Others are calling President Boor’s statement a “paragraph of pomp”. The future of Craiolia remains in doubt, but you can trust CNNN to get you the latest situational news!

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CRN Transcript Excerpt From “Breaking News@Noon With Adam”, 6/6/19

Adam: So you know how last week we said that s—t had hit the fan in Bandar? Yeah, well that’s small beans compared to what is currently happening. Just an hour ago, negotiations between the Boor Administration and protesters broke down and now it seems like Bandar has gone to hell. With me on the phone here I have Tim Burkley who is on the scene of the mass riots. So, Tim, what can you tell us?

 

Tim: (Shouting over sound of protesters) It’s crazy out here Adam, just like you said. Thousands of people, many of them armed, are literally marching on the Capital Building. (Sounds of gunshots) Dear god, they’re firing their weapons. (Sounds of helicopters and a loud boom) The army is firing back! The Boor Administration may soon have a civil war on their hands if this keeps up. I’m actually not sure what to do! I think I’ll walk towards the soldiers with my hands in the air...

 

Adam: So it seems that the situation in Bandar has escalated rapidly. There seems to be at least one tank in the streets, and hundreds of soldiers are being airdropped in. There may be a civil war soo-

 

(Loud Beeping Noise)THIS IS A GOVERNMENT MESSAGE BEING BROADCASTED ON ALL FREQUENCIES. PAY ATTENTION TO THE FOLLOWING.

Mor Boor: This is your President speaking. Recent events in Bandar and across the nation have led me to declare a state of martial law, effective immediately. No one is allowed on the streets from 6:30 PM to 8:00 AM until further notice and rationing is now mandatory. More information will be available at the information posts being set up in all towns and cities by the army.

THIS HAS BEEN A GOVERNMENT MESSAGE.

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  • 2 weeks later...

“NOC Declares Independence”

CNNN, Bandar, Bandar Province. Just over a week after firefights erupted in Bandar, a group calling themselves the “New Order of Craiolia”, or NOC, have declared themselves independent from the government. The province of Coastal appears to be their main site of operations, with several different militia groups in that area pledging allegiance to them. President Mor Boor vowed to crush the rebellion in an official statement released this morning.

“Food Crisis Gets Better”

CNNN, Faldan, Akbar Province. Government-sponsored food rationing programs, as well as the seizing of dozens of Craiolian Pride cargo ships filled with food, have helped ease the food crisis and avert fears of a famine in the past few days.

 

“Parliament Effectively Dissolved”

CNNN, Bandar, Bandar Province. President Mor Boor ordered the retirement of all members of Parliament that are not part of the CDLP (Craiolian Democratic Lawmakers’ Party) earlier today due to the onset of martial law. Shortly after the announcement was made, the CDLP gained 173 new mwmbers. In doing this, Mor Boor has ensured that their will be little to no opposition to his “plans to save the nation”.

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“Government Convoy Ambushed”

CNNN, Bandar, Bandar Province. According to information from several sources, a motorized infantry convoy ahs been ambushed by rebel forces in the northwest quadrant of Coastal Province. No further information has been received at the moment, but more conflicts like this will certainly be happening as the civil war heats up.

 

“Military Liaison Press Established”

CNNN, Bandar, Bandar Province. The Boor Administration has released a statement saying that the “Military Liaison Press”, or MLP, has been created to report news related to the war. The MLP is expected to begin operations tomorrow.

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  • 2 weeks later...

“Air Force Raids NOC Bases”

MLP, Bandar, Bandar Pr. Two weeks after the ambush on a government convoy that took the lives of three soldiers, three squadrons of C-22 fighter jets and one squadron of CP-15 tactical bombers attacked several NOC bases, causing reportedly extensive damage. No planes were shot down in the raids.

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